In the spirit of the current Facebook meme of publishing 25 "random" facts about oneself:1) Mormons make really good public servants because we can keep secrets and always bring jello.
2) Mormons make really bad coffee, mostly because we don't like to make it. Postum on the otherhand...somebody get Starbucks on the phone, we may have the solution to their slow down.
3) When we say "when I was overseas/down south, back east/out of the country for two years" I mean my mission. You're supposed to know that and ask me more about it.
4) All Mormons play basketball. It's in the Doctrine and Covenants somewhere.
5) All Mormons dance and play the piano (see rule above).
6) Yes all these kids are mine, and yes they were all "planned" whatever that means.
7) Military wards are like regular wards except it's ok not to know anybody's name because you either just moved in or they did.
8) Mormon cops just love it when you use your temple recommend to get out of a ticket (I have this on good source).
9) We listen to little streams. Give.
10) We all don't go to BYU or love the Jazz. Many of us will never talk to you again if you make that assumption.
11) We single-handedly kept the SUV market going a good 7 years after its prime.
12) Mocking Mormon celebrities is encouraged, mocking Mormon leaders will get you kicked off our friends list.
13) Porter Rockwell was right.
14) The Tricare happiness continuum swings up sharply after your second kid and a quick calculation of what copays would run you for perscriptions alone.
15) Mormons do make excelent desginated drivers, but lousy liars so consider that next time you ask us to drive.
16) Yes I am calling home again, and yes it's to the same/only wife.
17) Odds are I do have a cousin in UT but no I don't know an Osmond.
18) "Hey do you know (insert random Mormon you knew in high school)?" really does sound as dumb as it sounds unless we went to high school together in which case yes I did.
19) When we say we have church for three hours on Sunday we're not including commercials because there are no commercials to TIVO through.
20) We marry early for the same reason everyone gets married. For the attention.
21) Yes we know Harry Reid is a Mormon and a Democrat. They even let him speak at BYU...one time.
22) We don't wear "magic" underwear and it really does sound that stupid when you ask about it.
23) It's not "Joe Smith" or "that gold book" the same way it's not "Marty Luther" or "the bible thingy."
24) We do have more grain in our crawl space than most African nations. Not sounding so stupid now is it?
25) We know where we came from, why we're here, and where we're going. We also know we're going to have a good time while we're at it.
